love actually

For quite sometime now, I have been feeling that there is something shimmering, dancing and playing deep inside me that was just there...living..and if it ever came to live through me now, then I will have lived..But, there is something , some barrier that deeply sepaarates this part of me from showing up ...my mind ...and its logic, its vices, its negativity...and whenever I do meditation, some part, a teeny-weeny part of this barrier seems to break, and I am that shimmering something...smiling and ready to serve...where nothing can touch me..and soon the gap closes...But there is still a small hole left where the 'light' leaks through....And I am sure that I will find this light, that I will let it seep through me...all it needs is just time, intensity and authencity..like a burning torch that is pure...so pure, innocent and I am the fuel to the torch...and I am the torch